I'll Put Your Allowance Jar Right Next to Mine

As with all parenting subjects, perspectives will most certainly vary for each of our families. I’m not suggesting my thoughts are the right way for you, I’m simply giving a perspective as it has successfully worked for my family. That being said…

THIS MOMMA DON’T PAY ALLOWANCE!!

They have all heard me say,

“When YOU pay ME for cleaning and cooking daily,
I’ll pay YOU for making your bed!”

Knowing I probably won’t get paid for my chores any time soon,

I’m not too concerned with saving my money to fill their allowance jar, either! J

Keeping in a mind set of chores being a foundation for the work they are to do as adults, I do not believe money is the appropriate award for children who complete chores. When they are older and have paying jobs, there is no doubt in my mind a paycheck will be an encouraging factor to keep them working. I do not have to pay them now to instill a desire for money in them later! Unfortunately, greed is already a  basis of human desire. This is definitely not a learned behavior, but rather a behavior we need to learn out of. We must be cautious because we can contribute to a negative emphasis on money in their lives if we consistently use money as a reward when they are children. I do not want my grown children to work simply for a paycheck and I do not want them to contribute to our family now simply for an allowance.

As parents, we have always provided for the needs of our children and the money they would earn for chores (if they did earn money) would go towards wants, not needs. I want them to understand the true rewards of their contributions are of non-monitory value. I hope and pray this lesson will continue with them as they choose their future careers. Although I understand they will need a paycheck for survival, I hope they are in a position of living their lives by Heart’s Intent and choose a job for the rewards of the work, not for the money.

Even though I do not pay my own children for their daily chores, I do have an exception to my own rule. Many times in the past my children have asked for a special toy or trip and instead of simply giving it to them, I have given them the opportunity to earn it. They do not get rewarded for their expected daily chores, however if we have worked out a goal ahead of time, they are able to do services in our house above and beyond the minimum. This has taught them when you work above and beyond what is expected of you in life, you can reap not only the benefits of pride and satisfaction, but you may also be rewarded with additional desires.

My children have earned things such as money to spend or a special toy they wanted, but their requests usually fall more into categories like a friend can sleepover, you can choose the movie for family movie night, you can be the server at dinner time, or a one-on-one trip to the ice cream store (or the Dollar Store a.k.a. “Heaven-On-Earth” to them). In the new world of pre-teens, I realize a PS3 game purchase, new CD, or new shoes work well to make her smile. She is a great money saver, also, so she has been paid and saved money for large rewards such as Kids College or camp fees in the past.

In our home, they most often receive special rewards for helping with a sibling. Especially when helping with homework because our current education system seems to believe we should do 6 hrs of school and 4 hrs of homework in addition to sports, dance, free time, family time, dinner time, bath time, reading time, and all of the other time that fits into our most typical 96 hour day!  Homework help with a sibling is greatly appreciated!! If we get a bit behind on our laundry schedule, folding or helping with someone else’s stack is highly appreciated and rewarded as well.

By the way…my children all knew how to work the life cycle of laundry at the age of 5! This includes sorting, loading, working the machines on your own, folding, AND putting away! I did help the little guys with soap for a while, though, for fear of our home floating away on a cloud of bubbles. They’ve mastered this art now and although I help out more during the school year, in summer time, they are on their own!

If you have a neighbor or grandparent who you need help caring for or if you are doing a big cleaning getting ready for a family dinner…those are great extra chores, too. All-in-all, I would suggest you make chores about the satisfaction of getting them complete. Don’t make the emphasis on money.

Today, I wish for you, to find a new application in your life for the old cliché 

“Money doesn’t buy happiness.”

          …or love

                    …or satisfaction

                              …or even really good chore-completing-children.

My this Spring Break bring new focus to Spring Cleaning! :)